Have you watched that tv screen?
and said, I can do that! – kind of mean.
If those guys can do it, so can I!
I’ll just do that, I will try.
Then you take a really small hammer
Swing it, smash it, cause a clammer
and break a whole big bunch of stuff
You look around and things look rough.
You try, as you may, to amend
The mess you made and you pretend
that you didn’t just break your bathroom today
and your husband is driving, he is on his way
home to see what you have done
While watching Chip and Jo, you haven’t won
Instead you lost and you can’t see
How he is going to forgive you and let you be
home alone with that new house
You want to shrink to the size of a mouse
and climb into a little hole
The bathroom is ruined, you took a tole
on the beautiful thing that you just bought
Why did you do this, you think and fraught
So you blame those guys on that tv
and say, “It wasn’t cute little me,”
I won’t take the blame,
It’s not that bad!?
I can’t believe that hammer I took
and the idea I had, that I mistook
Reality for what is seen on TV
oh woe is this girl, oh silly ol’ me!
What they showed you in an hour
Gave you Delusional Hollywood Power
Is not what you can accomplish, you silly goose
You’re head was full of screws real-loose!
So don’t make the same mistakes I made
I’ll tell you right now, I suggest you trade
the hammer in your hand for a remote
and sit on your butt and only tote
a bag of chips
Cause those Hollywood tricks
Will make you believe that you can do
Some things that you can’t, boy, that is true!
So sit, and just chill, instead of smash
It will save you some worry, and a ton of cash….
I can really have a good laugh at this now. This really happened to me. I went on a serious binge watching marathon of “Fixer Upper” last year. I don’t really watch TV, unless it is a show that I recorded. I usually just watch a tiny bit before I go to sleep. SO, I was behind the times with current events and found Fixer Upper last year right after my husband and I bought our first home.
BAD MOVE. I got brain-washed, wrongly motivated and delusional thoughts that I could definitely-probably do exactly what they were doing to my home. DUH. I suffered from DHP – Delusional Hollywood Power.
That hour-long show was all I needed to make my bathroom a heavenly oasis. I was going to do demo-day, spruce up a couple things, start a fantastic project for my husband and I, and I was going to do it right then and there. I thought, “look what these hands can do!
I built the fire-place surround with these hands. I can surely rip that bathroom apart and put that thing back together just the way I want. NO problem.
So I took a wood chisel, about twelve inches long by one inch wide, a regular nail hammer and started to “Chip and Joanna Gaines” away at my master bath. WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!
That silly wood chisel didn’t stand a chance against the simple tile surround on my vanity. The tiny damage it created just made a gross mess in my bathroom. I made more bumps and damage to the wood chisel than to the vanity I was trying to “demo day.” I felt like such a fool and I was so sad. What a silly goose I was.
We had just bought our beautiful new home and I broke it. What was husband going to say when he got home? I was so embarrassed. I let Hollywood hurt my mind and my house. haha. silly me.
So, don’t make the same mistakes I made.
Stay on your cozy couch. Be entertained. DO NOT let them brain-wash you too. Unless you are a contractor, realize a budget, talk to your husband, set aside 5 plus months like they REALLy did, and the right tools to do the job.
Please, please – I’m begging you – stay on your cozy couch!
What did my husband say when he got home? He just hugged me and told me not to watch that tv show again. And he was kidding. He is so kind. I let my ego have it for being so naive.
I kinda fixed my demo-day. But those marks on the wall are still there today. A constant reminder to not take on too much.
Please comment and share some funny DIY projects that you have taken on. I’d love to hear from you. Am I alone? Did Chip and Joanna cuteness and amazing decorating ideas make you think that you could do Demo Day at your house too!?
PS. I LOVE “Fixer Upper”. It’s on of my favorite shows. I didn’t stop watching. I just stopped “fixing” my house. xoxox
In all things, pick up your Bible and read. I will always try my hardest. I will always learn from my mistakes and I will always work for and towards God’s Command. I will serve him, write my Blog and spread his word for all to hear. GOD IS SO GOOD. Always and everything all for His Glory!
Philippians 4:13 – I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.